eharmony, for people over 40
Take one long questionnaire about the life you have built, then receive a small set of matches chosen from your answers.
What eharmony suits
Someone who is certain they want a long-term relationship and would rather answer a thorough questionnaire once than browse for months.
Who should skip it
People dating casually or looking for something short-term should look elsewhere, because the app is not built for them.
Ready to try it for yourself? Create your account on the app in about five minutes, and delete it whenever you want.
How matching works on eharmony
A long intake questionnaire produces matches rather than letting you browse. You are handed a small set and decide on those, which is a fundamentally different experience from a stack.
What the app assumes about you
The intake questions assume a life already in progress: children, faith, work, money, and what you want the next decade to look like. If you have had enough of apps that ask nothing about you, this one asks everything.
What the interface asks of you
The interface is form-based and unhurried, which is easier to learn than any swipe app. The length of the questionnaire is the real obstacle, and it is worth doing in two sittings rather than one long evening.
Where the free tier stops
The paid tier is the product. The app cannot be used meaningfully without paying, so the free tier exists to show you what you would be buying rather than to be used.
Your time, your children and your privacy
Answering the questionnaire honestly means putting a great deal of personal detail into a system. Decide beforehand how much about your children, your health and your finances you are willing to write down, and stop at that line rather than at the end of the form.
Why people leave eharmony
The commitment weighed against how many people they are shown. The small set is the point of the matching and it is also what people get frustrated by.
What the design is built for
Every match here comes out of the intake questionnaire, and the questionnaire is long enough to take an evening on its own. The gating is the product rather than a side effect of it, and it decides what you are shown before any browsing begins.
The honest summary
eharmony asks for an evening of honest answers and then narrows the field for you. If you know what you want and would rather be matched on it than browse, that focus is the point; if you are unsure, it asks too much.
Other apps people move to
Each of these fits a different reason for leaving. None of them is better in the abstract.
Before you install anything
A profile problem looks exactly like an app problem, and choosing well depends on knowing which one you have.
Ready to meet someone?
You have read what each app is built for. The next step is an account on the app itself, created on their site in a few minutes, not here.